Well, I may be insane, but I signed up for NaNoWriMo - National Novel Writing Month.
It is a yearly event where thousands of people try to write a fifty thousand word novel in thirty days. I last tried it in 2005, and did succeed - but still have never finished the novel I started there - I got to about sixty thousand words and got stuck.
It was hard - I was in with a group of seven friends from a writing site, and only two of the seven of us made it. It's kind of insane - you have to write at least two thousand words a day, and it has to be a new work you started just for NaNo - but I have proven to myself that it is possible - and I plan on doing it again. Now, if I could only decide on what I will write about. :)
If you would like to learn more about NaNoWriMo, the main site is here, and if you would like to follow my progress, my personal NaNo page is here.
Wish me luck! - and forgive me if I am somewhat absent and/or cranky for the month of November :)
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Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Monday, October 12, 2009
Pizza!
I made the best pizza ever yesterday, and would like to share my recipe.
I started with a recipe that Princess shared with me for Oven Dried Tomatoes, which are wonderful just by themselves…
You will need
About 8 Roma Tomatoes
1 teaspoon (5cc) of salt
1 teaspoon (5cc) of sugar
1 teaspoon (5cc) of thyme leaves
Cut the stem ends from the tomatoes, then slice them in half lengthwise. Arrange them on a cookie sheet covered with tin-foil or on a metal rack. Mix the three dry ingredients together and sprinkle it over the tomatoes. Drizzle a little olive oil over them, and roast them at 250 degrees F (121 degrees C) for 4 hours.
These are wonderful just as they are out of the oven, but you can use them for many other things too – like pizza :)
For the Pizza you will need;
Several oven dried tomatoes (see above)
Pizza Crust
Shredded Mozzarella cheese (about a cup or two)
Fresh mushrooms (about half a cup)
Half a pound (1/4 kg) of raw shrimp
Grated Parmesan/Romano cheese (maybe ¼ cup or less)
Olive oil
1-2 cloves of garlic
About 1/8 cup beer or white wine
Preheat the oven to 450 degrees F (232 degrees C). Sauté the shrimp in olive oil, crushed garlic, and a little beer or white wine. Arrange the tomatoes on a pizza crust which has been drizzled with olive oil (I cheated and used a Boboli pre-made crust – must learn to make my own now). Cover the tomatoes with shredded mozzarella cheese, then top with shrimp and sliced fresh mushroom. Sprinkle some more mozzarella over this, and then a mix of Parmesan and Roman cheese to taste. Bake right on the oven rack for 5 minutes and serve… Yum!
Be well, my friends, and may this pizza dance joyfully over your taste buds :)
I started with a recipe that Princess shared with me for Oven Dried Tomatoes, which are wonderful just by themselves…
You will need
About 8 Roma Tomatoes
1 teaspoon (5cc) of salt
1 teaspoon (5cc) of sugar
1 teaspoon (5cc) of thyme leaves
Cut the stem ends from the tomatoes, then slice them in half lengthwise. Arrange them on a cookie sheet covered with tin-foil or on a metal rack. Mix the three dry ingredients together and sprinkle it over the tomatoes. Drizzle a little olive oil over them, and roast them at 250 degrees F (121 degrees C) for 4 hours.
These are wonderful just as they are out of the oven, but you can use them for many other things too – like pizza :)
For the Pizza you will need;
Several oven dried tomatoes (see above)
Pizza Crust
Shredded Mozzarella cheese (about a cup or two)
Fresh mushrooms (about half a cup)
Half a pound (1/4 kg) of raw shrimp
Grated Parmesan/Romano cheese (maybe ¼ cup or less)
Olive oil
1-2 cloves of garlic
About 1/8 cup beer or white wine
Preheat the oven to 450 degrees F (232 degrees C). Sauté the shrimp in olive oil, crushed garlic, and a little beer or white wine. Arrange the tomatoes on a pizza crust which has been drizzled with olive oil (I cheated and used a Boboli pre-made crust – must learn to make my own now). Cover the tomatoes with shredded mozzarella cheese, then top with shrimp and sliced fresh mushroom. Sprinkle some more mozzarella over this, and then a mix of Parmesan and Roman cheese to taste. Bake right on the oven rack for 5 minutes and serve… Yum!
Be well, my friends, and may this pizza dance joyfully over your taste buds :)
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Another Train
Fiona played this song on echoes tonight - I had not heard it in many years, but is one one of my favorite songs... and amazingly applicable to myself..
ANOTHER TRAIN
Words and music - Pete Morton
The beginning is now and will always be
You say you lost your chance, then fate brought you defeat
but that means nothing, you look so sad
You've been listening to those who say you missed your chance
There's another train, there always is
Maybe the next one is yours
Get up and climb aboard another train
You feel you're done there's no such thing
although you're standing on your own your own breath is king
The beginning is now don't turn around
Regrets of bad mistakes will only drain you
There's another train, there always is
Maybe the next one is yours
Get up and climb aboard another train
We crawl in the dark sometimes and think too much
Then we fill our heads with crazy things that only break our hearts
and I know you've seen what the earth can do
When it's dragging down another load of worrisome fools
There's another train, there always is
Maybe the next one is yours
Get up and climb aboard another train
I know it's hard when you feel confused
You can crown yourself with fear now you feel you cannot move
You're building worlds that don't exist
Imagination plays the worst tricks
There's another train, there always is
Maybe the next one is yours
Get up and climb aboard another train
There always is
Maybe the next one is yours
Get up and climb aboard another train
ANOTHER TRAIN
Words and music - Pete Morton
The beginning is now and will always be
You say you lost your chance, then fate brought you defeat
but that means nothing, you look so sad
You've been listening to those who say you missed your chance
There's another train, there always is
Maybe the next one is yours
Get up and climb aboard another train
You feel you're done there's no such thing
although you're standing on your own your own breath is king
The beginning is now don't turn around
Regrets of bad mistakes will only drain you
There's another train, there always is
Maybe the next one is yours
Get up and climb aboard another train
We crawl in the dark sometimes and think too much
Then we fill our heads with crazy things that only break our hearts
and I know you've seen what the earth can do
When it's dragging down another load of worrisome fools
There's another train, there always is
Maybe the next one is yours
Get up and climb aboard another train
I know it's hard when you feel confused
You can crown yourself with fear now you feel you cannot move
You're building worlds that don't exist
Imagination plays the worst tricks
There's another train, there always is
Maybe the next one is yours
Get up and climb aboard another train
There always is
Maybe the next one is yours
Get up and climb aboard another train
Thursday, October 8, 2009
I Miss Myself
It has been about a year since my life exploded - I deleted Faeria, lost my home and family in TAW, lost my lover, moved in to an apartment that is a converted garage without heat really in the room where my PC is with an alcoholic landlord... life got very dark for me me, and in many ways still is.
Many times over the last year I have reacted with anger or simply run and hid from life - cried more tears than I ever thought it was possible to contain - and bitten at many of my friends. I have become a dark and moody creature who seems to clutch at defeat - to wallow in pain and anger and frustration. I fell in love love with someone who lives several hundred miles away, and the frustration of not being able to be with that person has caused me to lash out at her too, and to try to drive her away at times.
I did it again to her last week - told her it was just too frustrating and impossible - that the pain of loving her but not being able to be with her was too much and that I had to get away from the relationship... but as I wallowed anew in that pain I remembered being the gardener - remembered being the Queene of Faeria - remembered the joy I found in helping others and trying to show them another path... and I longed for that part of myself.
I always told all of you to seek joy - that in every day there is some joy and that we must look for it - but I lost the ability for me to see it myself. Maybe I lost the desire, or maybe I lost the ability to see it - but I realized that I want that back - I want to become that person again.
I asked my love to take me back - I asked her to forgive me - and I think that she might be crazy because she did :) The problem is that it was the person I was with whom she fell in love - not the person I seem to have become.
It's a battle to hold on to the joy - my mind keeps seeking the darkness and seeing the problems with everything - does not want to see the joy, but I have been wrestling with it - consciously trying to find that joy, and I can see that it is there. I can feel the joy in simple moments if I concentrate on it - but it is a constant struggle to keep myself from dropping back into the darkness - a real wrestling match between my mind's perception and reality.
The truth is though that I miss the joy, but that joy is right here, all around me - it's in the autumn leaves - in the cool breezes of fall - in the hearts and arms of my friends who, for some reason, keep reaching out to me - keep refusing to give up on me.
I am angry with myself - angry at the darkness - angry at my inability to follow my own advice most of the time - angry at the drama I cause. I miss me. I miss the me that was. I want to find her - bring her back - and in some small ways I think that I might be starting to do that.
Please help me my friends - please keep reminding me that there IS joy in every day - tell me when I am bringing too much drama to a situation or am reacting out of anger or a desire for the darkness. Help me bring the gardener back, and help me to listen to her words - words that helped many of you in your own times of distress.
There IS at least some joy in every day - may we all seek it instead of the darkness. The things that have happened to me in the last year have really been horrible, but they are no excuse to forget that.
Many times over the last year I have reacted with anger or simply run and hid from life - cried more tears than I ever thought it was possible to contain - and bitten at many of my friends. I have become a dark and moody creature who seems to clutch at defeat - to wallow in pain and anger and frustration. I fell in love love with someone who lives several hundred miles away, and the frustration of not being able to be with that person has caused me to lash out at her too, and to try to drive her away at times.
I did it again to her last week - told her it was just too frustrating and impossible - that the pain of loving her but not being able to be with her was too much and that I had to get away from the relationship... but as I wallowed anew in that pain I remembered being the gardener - remembered being the Queene of Faeria - remembered the joy I found in helping others and trying to show them another path... and I longed for that part of myself.
I always told all of you to seek joy - that in every day there is some joy and that we must look for it - but I lost the ability for me to see it myself. Maybe I lost the desire, or maybe I lost the ability to see it - but I realized that I want that back - I want to become that person again.
I asked my love to take me back - I asked her to forgive me - and I think that she might be crazy because she did :) The problem is that it was the person I was with whom she fell in love - not the person I seem to have become.
It's a battle to hold on to the joy - my mind keeps seeking the darkness and seeing the problems with everything - does not want to see the joy, but I have been wrestling with it - consciously trying to find that joy, and I can see that it is there. I can feel the joy in simple moments if I concentrate on it - but it is a constant struggle to keep myself from dropping back into the darkness - a real wrestling match between my mind's perception and reality.
The truth is though that I miss the joy, but that joy is right here, all around me - it's in the autumn leaves - in the cool breezes of fall - in the hearts and arms of my friends who, for some reason, keep reaching out to me - keep refusing to give up on me.
I am angry with myself - angry at the darkness - angry at my inability to follow my own advice most of the time - angry at the drama I cause. I miss me. I miss the me that was. I want to find her - bring her back - and in some small ways I think that I might be starting to do that.
Please help me my friends - please keep reminding me that there IS joy in every day - tell me when I am bringing too much drama to a situation or am reacting out of anger or a desire for the darkness. Help me bring the gardener back, and help me to listen to her words - words that helped many of you in your own times of distress.
There IS at least some joy in every day - may we all seek it instead of the darkness. The things that have happened to me in the last year have really been horrible, but they are no excuse to forget that.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Empty..
A wonderful friend posted this on her blog for me, and it struck a very deep chord in me. Thank you, Athena - and my apologies for copying your blog post :)
Friday, October 2, 2009
My Apologies....
I am sorry for my silence, my friends – but I have not had anything to share in a long time. My life is pretty much a complete disaster, and last night I think I finished it off entirely.
I love you all very much, and I miss you, but I guess that it is time for me to crawl into a deeper hole and stop trying.
I will probably surface again in time, but I do not expect any of you to wait for me again – I have done this too many times and I must stop now.
Goodbye, my friends – may your lives be bright.
I love you all very much, and I miss you, but I guess that it is time for me to crawl into a deeper hole and stop trying.
I will probably surface again in time, but I do not expect any of you to wait for me again – I have done this too many times and I must stop now.
Goodbye, my friends – may your lives be bright.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Another view of Tirnanogue
The design of Tirnanogue has been evolving. Miss Alpha has been creating special sculpties for me to simulate the earth berm around the back and sides of the house, and this morning I did a rough test fit of the new pieces. We are still working on these, but here is a first view of sort of what it will look like with the earth filled in around it...
And here is a view looking in the front door at the kitchen....
After reading about Italian pizza ovens, I decided that one in the kitchen to help provide supplemental heat would be a good idea. Can't you just smell the bread cooking in here?
And finally, here is a view from the doorway to the library - looking out the front through the office/spare room...
Slowly, the model is coming together. Building it in SL this way is very exciting - it makes it so much easier to see how things come together and to visualize how certain parts of the home will work - it has also led to several subtle design changes as I find things that do not work and ways around them.
I will spend the winter refining the design, and with luck - in the spring - I will be able to start searching for a plot of land on which to build it. There is still a long way to go, but it is very exciting to see it starting to come together.
And here is a view looking in the front door at the kitchen....
After reading about Italian pizza ovens, I decided that one in the kitchen to help provide supplemental heat would be a good idea. Can't you just smell the bread cooking in here?
And finally, here is a view from the doorway to the library - looking out the front through the office/spare room...
Slowly, the model is coming together. Building it in SL this way is very exciting - it makes it so much easier to see how things come together and to visualize how certain parts of the home will work - it has also led to several subtle design changes as I find things that do not work and ways around them.
I will spend the winter refining the design, and with luck - in the spring - I will be able to start searching for a plot of land on which to build it. There is still a long way to go, but it is very exciting to see it starting to come together.
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